LA - It's Finally Happened.

Okay so I guess I have been waiting for that one experience that has thrust me into accepting that I live in Los Angeles now. So far its kind of been a typical town... except maybe:
A. when I went to the Privilege and Paris Hilton was there I was thinking hmm... How Los Angeles of me...

B. I went to the Santa Monica Blvd. Halloween Carnivale and still couldn't get away from Fresno because Kevin Federline performed but hey - it was pretty weird but I don't know if that quite qualifies...yet.

C. Then I went to the AFI fest - again how Los Angeles of me...but still not enough validation for this recent relocator.

FINALLY - last night I believe I recieved the validation that I was looking for, you know, the whole "whoa I am really in Los Angeles a crazy city" factor.

It all began with a friend referring me to Danny Tanner. No not Bob Saget's character from "Full House", Danny Tanner the Hair Dresser located off of Melrose near the Pacific Design Center (that is pretty LA right?). So I make an appointment to see Danny Tanner and get my hair did.
Well, I think I did forget to mention and I am glad my friend forewarned me that Danny Tanner has two of rows of metal spikes surgically implanted into his skull. Sweet.

So I show up for my appointment and I am about 15 minutes early. I walk in and I see a fit 40 year old Spiked Skull Danny Tanner in a small very cute Hair salon on the second floor loft. Did I mention the very cute salons building covered in Ivy is above an erotic emporium...yes a sex store. I think that is an extra brownie point for LA. One thing I have learned about LA is that if it walks like a duck, sounds like a duck, smells like a duck - it's probably a sex store.
Anyway, he is finishing up with his previous client whom he had completed extensions on and was trying to talk me into doing it as well (way too LA for me) and then preceeded to tell me that he tanned her. Yup, he bought a spray tan machine and was giving free tans. Now how could I turn that down? But we'll get to that later.

So- I sat down in his chair and there was one other hair stylist still working at a station behind us. We got to talking about what I do and I mentioned that one of our department holiday parties is going to be Drag Queen Bingo. Yes folks, Drag Queens are going to be hosting a bingo night at the WB. (Yay LA scores points again!)

The hairstylist behind us who is very open about his homosexuality continues raving that he has actually been to a Drag Queen Bingo Night and begins ranting "It is not malignant it is B9". Needless to say I am now looking forward to DQBN. Oh and don't forget the Pet Shop Boys album playing in the background almost the entire time...

The haircut is finished and I love it. So fun and artsy. It's Tan time! Not actually realizing that the tan machine he was talking about is a portable machine that body builders use before a competition he instructs me to get down to my skivvies. I haven't shaved my legs in two days or my pits and he was like "Oh Hunny I don't care I'm an artist you'd be surprised what I've seen" Thinking I have come this far in LA, I couldn't be as bad as what Danny Tanner has seen. Down to my skivvies I went and I stood there in the bathroom while Danny Tanner spray tanned me. (haha I am laughing so hard right now - because I'm hoping you can picture this.)

I dried off - put the clothes back on. Then got the low down from Danny Tanner "Okay no going to the gym tonight and wait to shower till tomorrow and call me tomorrow and tell me how it turned out, I'm still learning but I'm going to start taking classes tomorrow (haha yeah seriously he said that). He was washing a clients hair who worked at the Erotic Emporium downstairs who he had tanned the day before (she looked fine which was comforting) and she quickly told me "Oh and no SEX tonight either, trust me...(yeah she seriously said that).

So Let's add this up:

Spiked Skull Danny Tanner in a hair salon above an erotic emporium (they sell couture condoms after all) gave me a great artsy hair cut and spray tanned me in my underwear in the bathroom. Then his sex store client did her part in promoting abstinence.
>sigh<
Alright LA. You got me.